Friday, June 26, 2009

Fighting with Ourselves

Today I saw my youngest fighting with himself. The inner battle of pride joined with independence and determination. I had asked him to move some lumber that had been sitting in the yard and to stack it neatly until we could get to it. After a while, the bad attitude coupled with lots of raw emotions, displayed with fist of frustration well, it started to really grate my nerves.

My first inkling was to quickly chastise him for his outburst and poor attitude, but then it occurred to me, that all he really had to do was ask for help. As he tried to untangle this heap of wood and boards by himself he got more upset and more frustrated and more determined to show it who was boss. Tears came and went, soon grunts and groans. Pouting in defeat. All the while I kept praying please just ask mama for help and I will gladly come help you...

Oh how I know this place.

If you threw in a few cuss words that could've been me! Not such a pretty site mind you, especially when you are 40 something and striving to live a life for Christ...there is no secret I fall short more often than not.

It got me to thinking about how so many times my heart would have been spare so much discouragement and frustration if I had only asked the Lord for help.
In my pride and determination to be independent I learn the hard way.

So, here is the lesson, it is much easier to be interdependent than alone.

Lord I pray for my son today, it was difficult to watch him struggle. It must be difficult for you as well Lord, watching us struggle as we so often do. Give him courage today to die to self and ask for help from someone who loves him. Lord I pray that he will come to you first with all that he has in him, that you would work mightily in his little heart and teach my son your loving ways. Amen


chaser of the wind said...

this made me tear up a bit, mama.
oh life, it isn't smooth sailing.
i'm encouraged by you, love much.

bee'nme said...

Heather, this is a lovely analogy...what a poignant observation. I'm sure the Lord looks at us and feels the same thing you did...just ask for help Child. Very touching post. I hope you have enjoyed your summer vacation and you come back refreshed and ready for the next chapter...

Hugs & Blessings,
Becky S. at Just Bee 'n Me